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  • cassiekarch

Relationship or not?

Why does society try to make single people feel as if they need to be in a romantic relationship?  They make it seem as if being in one is the only way to survive in life. According to a google search, people who are unmarried are considered incomplete, lonely, and despairing. Isn't that sad?  I think so.  With the so-called "Love Day" coming up in less than a week, some people believe they should be in a relationship just to obtain validity from their peers.


So many of us single people are looked down upon because we are single.  God forbid you let your singleness last more than 2 years. If you do, people start asking all sorts of questions like what's wrong with her, why is she still single or they feel like you probably can't keep a man. For men, they assume he is probably a woman beater or drug user and that is why he’s single.  So much speculation on another person's life. For me, I have been single for a super long time because I wanted to make sure my kids were taken care of.  I didn't want to have a man, or men come in and out of their lives if it wasn't their fathers, I wanted stability for them.  As a kid my mom had men in and out of our home and I was determined not to repeat some of those behaviors with my children.  Pick up a copy of my book Identity Cry-Sis if you want to know more. 


What people fail to realize is that there is responsibility with being in a committed monogamous relationship.  You are responsible for another person's mental health and wellbeing.  You have to create a safe space for them to be open and honest with you and vice versa. You have to make time for them and they for you because without time what are we doing?  You are responsible for the decisions you make that could affect the person you are in a relationship with. Let's not get it twisted, not all romantic relationships are satisfying, but for the sake of this blog post we are talking about the ones that are.  And I don't care what anyone says, you need to check in with each other too.  No matter what type of relationship it is, it takes work for each party to make the relationship successful.  For me, I need interaction with my person daily.  What would we do if we weren't communicating every day? How can you build a relationship off of silence? You absolutely can't.


When you are single, you can come and go when you please.  You don't have to check in with anyone but yourself.  You are only responsible for you and your happiness.  Let's get it straight, singleness is not a disease and not everyone was meant to be in a committed monogamous relationship. I mean just look at the apostle Paul, he was single his whole life according to the scriptures. (1 Corinthians 7:8-9) We would assume he was okay with that, but who really knows.  Only you know what type of life you want to live and if you want to be single or in a relationship. Now if you are one of those people who desire a relationship, what are you doing to achieve that in your life? Are you ready for the type of commitment it takes to be in said relationship? 


As we approach this "Love Day" , instead of focusing on romance, we should celebrate living happy lives full of loving relationships regardless of their form. It is important to maintain healthy relationships, whether they are romantic, familial, friendships, or otherwise. Love should be encouraged and celebrated.

Sending you love, light and positive vibes,

Cassie K.

"Always remember to LIVE life to the fullest, to LAUGH at everything and to LOVE unconditionally!"

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1 Comment

Feb 12

Well said 😊 - K

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