Two weeks ago my blog post was about checking in on our mental health and this week I want to discuss therapy. I was talking to an elder in my family and briefly told them I was searching for a therapist, their immediate response was, "what do you need a therapist for, is something wrong with you?" I was immediately taken back and then I realized that therapy has always been a taboo subject in the black community. But why is it taboo? Black people have had to survive so much adversity and now they seek therapy and are told something is wrong with them. That just doesn't sit well. A lot of times we don't trust ourselves to become that vulnerable with another person for the fear of appearing weak. According to an article in https://www.mcleanhospital.org/essential/black-mental-health, ..."The root of mental health stigma among Black people can be traced back to slavery. At that time, it was commonly thought enslaved people were not sophisticated enough to develop depression, anxiety, or other mental health disorders. "From those historic misconceptions, we learned to ignore mental illness or call it other terms, like 'stress' and 'being tired,'" Crawford said..'"
And if you are someone who was brought up in the church, you were often told you don't need therapy because all you need to do is pray and God will help you. Yes, I believe that God will help us, but I also believe that God is the one who gave us therapists to help us too. And if you are a person like me, you are a stuffer. What is a stuffer you ask? Someone who keeps everything bottled up inside of them and doesn't talk about anything. I don't like to burden people with any issues or things I may be dealing with. I am the kind of person who will listen when one of my friends needs to vent but for the most part, I keep my things to myself. I have this one friend that I talk to often and they are always telling me to use them. They want me to open up and share if I need to let things out. And I do, sometimes. But most of the time I keep things to myself. I run through a lot of scenarios in my head, and it stays there until I let it out by writing or performing poetry.
If any of you have read my book Identity Cry-Sis, you know that I have been through so many traumatic experiences in my life and have never talked to anyone about it. Now writing my book was a form of release but I need to speak to someone to really unpack a lot of the things that happened to me, for me and by me in my lifetime. Get to the nitty gritty of certain situations that transpired. Maybe you are someone like me and have had challenging things happen in your life as well. You may even be dealing with some things in the here and now. I want to encourage you to find someone to talk to.
How can a therapist help you and me? In this way, we can gain a better understanding of how the mind works. Through therapy, we will be able to navigate our feelings, build healthier habits, and change our mindsets so that our lives look more like the ones we want. By learning new coping skills, coping techniques, and stress management strategies, we will be able to manage our feelings more effectively. You should go for it if it's right for you, if not, don't worry about it. All I can say is do what's best for you!
Sending you love, light and positive vibes,
Cassie K.
"Always remember to LIVE life to the fullest, to LAUGH at everything and to LOVE unconditionally!"