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STOP Keeping Score!

I will never understand a person who will do something nice for you and then keep score. That is not how I raised my children or how I was brought up. I have always taught them to look out for the people they love as well as those who God has placed in their paths. You bless people out of the kindness of your heart and because you were led to do so.


To many times in relationships people tend to keep score.  Why can’t we just give out of the kindness of our hearts, or because we want to? I was listening to an Instagram LIVE a few weeks back and the host was getting into a heated discussion with a person they obviously knew and was reminding them of everything they had done for them. It was like they had a score board on their wall and every time they bought this person something or gave them money, they were tallying it up. I thought it was demeaning and not important to the conversation when the host told the people in the comments and everyone watching that they had paid this person’s rent, helped with their car note and even bought groceries.  Why did everyone need to know all of that information? It really spoke to me on the content of their character and the need for validation from people they didn’t even know or will probably never meet.


The bible teaches us in Matthew 6:1-4 to be especially careful when you are trying to be good so that you don’t make a performance out of it.  It might be good theater, but the God who made you won’t be applauding. (2-4) when you do something for someone else, don’t call attention to yourself. When you help someone out, don’t think about how it looks. Just do it – quietly and unobtrusively. That is the way your God, who conceived you in love, is working behind the scenes, helps you out. If you have been raised in ministry you know that these verses normally are attributed to when you help someone in need specifically someone who is down on their luck for a season in their life, but for the purpose of this post, I am referring to be a blessing to anyone.


Scripture tells us in Galatians 6:7 to not be deceived as God is not mocked, you will reap what you sow.  Anytime you take care of others, you will be taken care of guaranteed.  Let’s say you bless someone with $50 for whatever reason, it’s not guaranteed that you will receive your blessing back the same way, but you could be given a 50-minute grace period when driving somewhere and end up missing a fatal accident.  Our blessings come in so many ways. 


If I am running to the store for a few items, I will ask anyone whoever is in my house at the time if they want something and I will get exactly what they ask for within reason. I will not return home and ask them for the money for the item because I offered.  In my opinion it’s the right thing to do. If I am heading to visit someone, a friend or one of my kids, I ask them if they need me to pick up anything along the way not expecting any money when I get there.


So, as you decide to give and bless people, I ask you to look within. Ask yourself why you are doing this good thing and decide if it’s for the right reasons.  If you feel you need to keep score, I say just don’t do it.  It’s not worth the heartache and pain it may cause you later on in life when you are reminiscing on those who haven’t done for you the same way you have for them.


Sending you love, light and positive vibes,

Cassie K.


“Always remember to LIVE life to the fullest, to LAUGH at everything and to LOVE unconditionally.”

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