Are you ready?
When I met Reggie in 2019, we started to build a friendship which I thought was moving toward a relationship as were planning to meet up again in late April 2021, but unfortunately Covid took him away in early April 2021 and here I am again. I feel that it’s important to become friends first before jumping into a romantic relationship. That way if it doesn't work out, at least two grown adults can still be friends.
So many of us say we want to be in a relationship, but have we really sat down with ourselves and figured out what we want? What is acceptable to us and what are our hard "No's" for the relationship? Do we give off energy that we are open for something? Or when we are approached, do we immediately shut folks down?
I have had to ask myself that question time and time again. Am I ready for a relationship? So many times, I have said yes, but then I look at different relationships of some of my friends and/or family and I say to myself, not today. What I fail to remind myself is that my relationship, once I have one, will not be like any of theirs. But one question I must ask, am I ready to commit and open up that part of my life to someone.
I was on a LIVE “dating show” a couple weeks ago and was asked the question of the type of man I was looking for. My answer to that was I wasn’t looking; he should be looking for me. To which I followed up with scripture. The bible tells us in proverbs 18:22 that when a man finds a wife, he finds a good thing and receives favor from the LORD. According to that verse, the man is searching for his woman, who is already wife like. The host laughed and asked the question again. To which I responded a good man, someone with integrity and knows how to treat his woman. The host asked me if that was all. Then he proceeds to tell me a scenario about me meeting a good man, but that man also has two other women who he treats very well and that I would be his third. And then I said absolutely not. Then he asked again, what am I looking for.
It was then I realized, I have not sat down and thought about it in a long time, As an adult, my focus has been on raising my children, work and ministry. I am happy to say all my children are adults now, so its time to refocus. When you have been single as long as I have, you just want a man who is a good person. Someone who likes some of the same things I like, a man I can learn from, who makes me laugh and enjoys life. Someone who can be my best friend, and me his. So, I challenge you as I challenge myself, write down what you like and dislike. What are some things you will absolutely not sway from? I don’t have a lot of pre-requisites, but the one thing that is most important to me is for this man to have his own relationship with God. And he must have a sense of humor as I am a connoisseur of comedy.
One thing I know for sure, is that two heads are better than one. I know with another person in my life, we could accomplish so much more. Now how do I meet this person who is to be my mate? I have no clue, as I am one of those people who enjoys being at home. Will he be a delivery guy or the mailman? Probably not. So, if you are in the market for a mate like I am, do what you can to make yourself seen. There are so many ways to meet people. Dating apps (which I don’t like), social media, grocery store, jazz club, the gym, the library, etc. Just make you sure you are giving off the energy that you are open to meet new people, make eye contact and strike up a conversation. It won’t always be a love connection, but you can also make some good friends too.
Sending you love, light and positive vibes,
"Always remember to LIVE life to the fullest, to LAUGH at everything and to LOVE unconditionally!"