Get you affairs in order!

cassiekarch
Aug 24, 2025
3 min read

These past few weeks have been quite the challenge. My dad has had to reach out to a lot of family and friends so that we could come together and get my uncle's services paid for. According to a google search, 68% of Americans don't have their affairs in order if they were to pass away and my uncle was among that percentage. On top of not having his affairs in order, we've had to locate his one and only estranged daughter to get her permission and signature to move forward with the plan for his services. This has been extremely hard for us.

Although a lot of families have been in disbelief and shock, we know that this is our reality and things have to be taken care of. This is the kind of work no one wants to think about, yet every last one of us has to face it at some point in our lives. Sending out emails to family and friends to collect photos for his slideshow. Figuring out what to write in his obituary. What type of music to play at his service making sure to honor what he loved most. Deciding on a day and time, so we can try to accommodate as many people as possible. Making all of this happen, even while the grief is still fresh in our spirits.

Getting your affairs in order isn't a death wish, it's a gift to those you leave behind. It's making sure your wishes are known and that all your important documents are well organized. It's giving your family a roadmap instead of the puzzle we are trying to fit together and we don't know where all the pieces are. It's letting your family know the music you'd want played, the photos you want shared and the type of service you'd like held in your honor.

We are still in the planning phase, trying to raise the funds needed to pay for everything. Some family members want one thing, while others want another and the divide/differences can make this process extremely challenging. If only my uncle would have left us a step by step guide on how he wanted to be remembered.

Over the last few weeks I have reminded my dad multiple times that he needs to get his stuff in order so that we won't be going through what he is now with the passing of his younger brother. Yes, I have most of my affairs in order according to the list I have shared below.

If you take anything from this post, let it be this: DON'T WAIT! Get your affairs in order - not just for yourself, but for the people you love most because when the time comes, it will already be a challenge to navigate planning and trying to process grief at the same time. You can lighten the load before they are even required to carry it.

Just to help anyone out who is reading this post I have added some practical steps to get your affairs in order:

Have a life insurance policy or funded account for services - so others don't have to raise money or fund your memorial or funeral.
Create or Update your will - clearly outline how you want your assets distributed once you're gone and assign a representative (executor) to make this happen.
Assign a Power of Attorney - choose someone you trust to make decisions on your behalf if you are incapacitated and can't.
Prepare and Advance Healthcare directive - share your medical care preferences.
Organize Important Documents - keep all certificates, licenses, policies, account details in one secure place.
Plan your memorial wishes - write down any songs, readings or traditions you want included.
List Key contacts - family, friends and professionals to be notified.
Share Access Information - make sure a trusted person can access digital accounts and important files
Communicate your plans - talk to loved ones so they know your wishes and where to find everything.