Getting out of survival mode!

A really good friend shared this statement with me that she saw on social media, and it hit home so hard. "You've been in survival mode for so long that even in a moment of peace, you can't relax." How many of you can relate to that statement? For years, my life has felt like a series of emergencies — emotional, financial, relational, and spiritual. It has been one thing after another. I've learned to adapt to each situation and in the middle of it I got stronger, quicker and more guarded.

For those of you who have read my book Identity Cry-Sis, you know that I have been through so many things and have had to endure and survive to get through. I've had to survive physical violence, emotional violence, houselessness, foreclosure, bankruptcy, and so much more.

While constantly finding ways to survive, I had to brace myself for the impact. I sometimes would stop waiting for things to get better and just endure what was happening in the moment. That is what happens when you are in survival mode, you keep going, NO MATTER WHAT!

No one talks about what happens when the chaos finally quiets down. What happens when those emergencies stop? When the ground stops shaking and you are still standing like it's about to give out underneath you?

That is where I have found myself at times. I would create my own tornado, just so I can weather yet another storm.

Life isn't perfect, but for me it's no longer on fire. Are there still challenges? Absolutely! But it's nothing that I have not been equipped for. Even though I am in therapy right now working through some of these issues, I still have racing thoughts. I often look for the next crisis before it even shows up. Peace can feel foreign sometimes. Unfamiliar and almost suspicious.

I have been in survival mode for so long that it can be challenging for me to find peace. I know that peace is within me. I know that God gives me peace but it's not about knowing but also doing. I often find it difficult to rest without feeling guilty. Letting my guard down without fear is scary. I have had to fight all my life because it was the fighting that has kept me and my family alive.

This is what I am learning: survival mode is a season and not a way of life. It was never meant to be a permanent fixture in my life. It served its purpose by protecting me and keeping me afloat, but now it's my time to heal. It's me relearning what SAFETY feels like. Giving myself permission to soften.

Peace isn't the absence of struggle - it's the presence of wholeness. And I discover each new day that I am allowed to have peace and wholeness. I was allowed to breathe deeply, to laugh without waiting for the bridge to collapse and to enjoy moments without being suspicious. Is it uncomfortable? Yes, at times, but it's also a kind of freedom that I have never known fully.

So, if you are reading this post and you are like me -- you have forgotten how to live without bracing for disaster — I want you to know that you are not alone. You are not broken. You've just been strong for far too long.

It's now your turn to be WHOLE!

Sending you love, light and positive vibes,

Cassie K.

#SayItOnSunday

#CassieKarch

"Always remember to LIVE life to the fullest, to LAUGH at everything and to LOVE unconditionally!"