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  • cassiekarch

Let go of the past!

How long do we hold on to what did or did not happen?  So many times, we hold on to offenses that cause us to miss out on what God has for our lives.  The other day I was talking to a friend of mine, and they were telling me how they were still upset with a family member who crossed a boundary when they were in their late teens and early twenties and my question to them was how long were they going to hold on to that offense? I mean come on; this friend is in their 40's now. By them holding on to that offense and deciding not to have a relationship with said family member could cause them to miss out on what life may or may not have for them. Their pride would not let them put that offense to the side and start over with the family member that they are always inquiring about.  What makes this situation sadder is that their family member wants to have a relationship with them. 

It is very disheartening when things happen in our lives, and we find ourselves in a place of unforgiveness. We can't move forward because we are still stuck in the past. Do we even think about what was going on at that time of the offense to see if we could come to understand why it may have happened in the first place? You would assume that when we mature in our thinking, we would start to understand why certain things may or may not have happened in the past. The bible says in Colossians 3:13 (NLT) Make allowance for each other's faults and forgive and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you should forgive others. I have always been taught that forgiveness is not for the other person, but for you. Forgiveness allows you to move past the offense and live your life.  Will you ever forget? Sometimes no, but at least you can be free of hurt, pain and despair.   

I grew up without my dad in my life as a young girl and didn’t get the guidance that I believed I needed from him.  Now I understand that I made certain decisions while growing up because of his absence.  How long do I hold him in contempt? Once we are older and realize that our parents are human just like we are, we begin to understand exactly what they were going through at that time so we should be able to show them grace. I had to think about how they were navigating through life at that time. Both of my parents were kids when I was born. They were only sixteen years old.  They were babies having a baby.  How can I expect them to be anything less than they were, kids. 

My dad grew up without his father and so he didn't have the guidance he needed.  There are a lot of things I did and did not do while I was raising my kids.  I exposed some of them to domestic violence situations.  I stayed when I should have left because I wanted them to have a whole family.  I was gone a lot when I was working 2 & 3 jobs to support them and so they didn't receive a lot of physical love from me. I was always tired, angry, sad, frustrated and all and all exhausted. But as my kids have grown to adults, they have made it known they forgive me and now understand why I acted a certain way. They didn't realize it at the time but now they know. 

I am not saying you have to bring every person back into your life, but the situation I am talking about at the beginning of this post makes it is clear that my friend wants a relationship with their family member, but because they are living a life of being offended, they just can't or won't even try. I implore you to do your best to forgive those who have offended you.  Think of all the people you may have offended, whether it was intentional or unintentional, I would only hope they forgave you.  I can guarantee your quality of life would be so much better once you release all those hard feelings of bitterness and unforgiveness.  You will feel so much lighter and see the world from a different perspective.

And if you would all stop what your doing and wish my brother Tyson a Happy Birthday today!

Thank you!

Sending you love, light and positive vibes,

Cassie K.

"Always remember to LIVE life to the fullest, to LAUGH at everything and to LOVE unconditionally!"

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19. Mai

Happy Birthday Tyson

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