Let the pain go.

Have you ever held on to something that caused you pain? Afraid to let it go because you wanted to remember everything about the situation or circumstance? How many of you have held onto screenshots of text messages that ended a friendship or pushed you over the edge. Or what about voicemails from a back-and-forth conversation you may have had before you both finally called it quits? We leave these reminders quietly tucked away in our phones, or on our computers and we rarely go back to them, yet they haunt us. Why do we keep them?

It's not because we enjoy the pain and hurt. It's because those messages of pain are proof that something mattered, that we mattered. I only recently deleted old vial messages from folks who I am close to where we had a misunderstanding back in 2018. I also deleted some other messages and videos from an old connection from back in 2016, those particular messages I would go back to when I was feeling a type of way. I finally gave myself permission to move forward and not let myself sit in what was.

When we save the remnants of hurt - old text, photos or voicemails, it's often less about the content and more about the connection we had. Those messages may have come from someone we loved, someone we lost or someone who broke us. Keeping it is a way of saying, "This happened. This was real." Letting go feels like erasing a chapter we are often not ready to close.

More often than not we have this illusion of control. We can't change how things transpired, but we can choose to revisit the moment over and over in hopes of some type of clarity, justice or closure. Most of the time by us going back down memory lane, it only deepens our wounds. I know for me, it caused anger, frustration and sadness when I would go back. It would remind me of a time that wasn't favorable. Don't get me wrong, there were good times, but it would appear that the bad times were louder.

But you want to know something? Holding on doesn't always mean healing. Sometimes, it delays it.

As we grieve different relationships in our lives, we need to allow space to breathe, not a constant reminder of what was. Our healing requires us to choose the present over the past. At some point, we need to realize that deleting those messages isn't forgetting - it's forgiving ourselves enough to move forward. I can tell you I felt so much lighter when I erased and deleted those old messages.

We don't have to let go of everything all at once. Slow and steady wins the race. Know that you are NOT the pain you preserve. YOU ARE the STRENGTH that survives it!

Sending you love, light and positive vibes, Cassie K.

#SayItOnSunday

#CassieKarch

"Always remember to LIVE life to the fullest, to LAUGH at everything and to LOVE unconditionally!"