A couple of months ago I decided I wanted to buy a purse backpack. My daughter is always getting on me about carrying too many items, for instance: a backpack, purse and maybe a plastic bag. She said to me one day, "mom, just get a purse backpack and you can dress that up nicely." On this particular day I was dressed down, I had on sweatpants, a hooded sweatshirt, a seahawks beanie and my purse. I entered into Ross Dress For Less with the intent of buying a backpack purse. After about five minutes of me walking around the purses I noticed a security guard in the aisle behind me. I had noticed him earlier, but I didn't pay him any mind because I was on a mission. Within the next few minutes, I saw another security guard in the aisle in front of me. All of the sudden my Spidey senses went off. These two knuckleheads were following me. I immediately went to the next aisle of purses and began recording myself talking about being profiled while I shop. I noticed in the camera the 3rd security guard was right behind me, pretending to look at purses. I got even louder on my video, as I was highly perturbed. I was being judged by the clothes I had on, and it made me mad. I mean think about it. These security guards perceived me as being suspicious while I was shopping due to their unfair stereotypes, implicit biases, or assumptions about me. Best believe I posted about it on my social media pages. I need my supporters to know and be aware just in case they too experience something similar. Safe to say I left and have not been back to that store since.
My friend Flame Monroe has a saying that she quotes quite often, and I want to share it with you. One of her favorite phrases is, "My money is spent everywhere." It's up to you and me to decide where we want to spend our hard-earned money. I am one of those people who write google reviews and if I am treated a certain type of way, best believe the world will know about it. I know we have all passed judgement on someone at one time or another because they didn't look the part. And if you say you haven't, I will call you a liar because we are human and we all do human things. That doesn't make it right or feel good when you are the one at the receiving end of such behavior. When we discriminate against someone, it says more about our biases than the other person. It shows that we have a lot of self-work to do. We need to be mindful of our prejudices. While we are not responsible for other people's judgements or biases, there are ways to navigate and address the situation if we want to. If we stay calm in the situation, our confidence can often diffuse the suspicion. Being mindful of our behavior can help too.
In the end it's up to us with where and whom we spend our money. I know for me; I am doing all I can to stay out of these stores owned and operated by big corporations. My goal is to shop at small businesses where 9 times out of 10, the customer service is top notch, and the people care about my business. What decision will you make the next time you go shopping?
Sending you love, light and positive vibes,
Cassie K.
"Always remember to LIVE light to the fullest, to LAUGH at everything and to LOVE unconditionally!"
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