top of page
  • cassiekarch

Take Accountability!!

It's high time we as adults take accountability for our actions.  When you make adult decisions, you reap adult consequences. You can't blame others for your choices.  I remember an elder I follow closely on social media telling a story a few months back. She was telling her audience about a time when she decided to invite herself to an "associate friends" party in another state. She wanted to celebrate with said friend.  Well, when she got there, she didn't get to spend as much time with that friend that she had hoped for, and she allowed her feelings to get hurt. She was upset for a brief moment because she felt slighted but what she failed to realize was that she took it upon herself to go there, she wasn't asked to come. After about a week or two, she realized the error of her ways and made an adjustment to her attitude and she and her friend were back to being on cordial terms again.


A few months back I had an associate trying to be my friend reach out to me to let me know he would be in my town.  He wanted to hang out and spend "quality time" with me.,  his words.  I agreed to make some time, but I also have a life. This person showed up a 2 weeks ago and we finally met after knowing each other online for almost 3 years.  And it was great to finally meet in person. But since he initially reached out all those months ago, I had already secured other events and commitments I needed to honor.  Can you believe he expected me to stop everything I had going on and just be right by his side! WHAT!!!


First off, I did not ask you to come here.  You made that adult decision all on your own and the fact that you didn't plan out your time here and banked on just being with me the entire time is absurd. Secondly, I have a whole job and a life that I live here, and it doesn't revolve around being up under and around someone because you had some delusional thoughts about your trip to Seattle. I mean come on now. We hadn't spoken for about 6 months, and then you decided, oh you were going to take a trip up here. Okay that is your prerogative, but it's also mine to do what I do what I want with my time. 


What I realized after he got here was his mind was only on one thing and unfortunately, I was not going to oblige him in that matter.  It's pretty sad that he didn't just come out and say I am traveling up there with the intention of having sex with you. I would have told him to save his trip.  It doesn't go down with me like that at this stage of my life.  Had you caught me in my early teens, you may have had a chance. And no, I am not embarrassed about that, it made me who I am today. Pick up a copy of my book Identity Cry-Sis if you want to know more about that time in my life.  What makes this encounter even worse is that he felt the $95 dollars he spent on dinner for us was a waste and so I offered to send him my half.  I can only assume he thought buying me dinner would give him the option to sleep with me and he was sadly mistaken. But what I won't do is have someone feeling like I used them, because it's never that.  And to add another thing, people should not be dating if they cannot afford to, and I am not only talking about finances. Before you date you should check yourself and ask are you emotionally, mentally, socially, and physically mature enough to date? Only you can answer that question.


The moral of this story is that we all need to take accountability for our actions in life.  Nothing happens by chance, and we all have a part we play in our demise or our successes.   If you want something, say something, and stop beating around the bush especially when we are all grown.  I guess some of us are just grown in numbers, but our mentality hasn't quite caught up yet. Make sure you are intentional in everything you do. Keep the main the main thing and be up front and honest.  I can guarantee life would be less complicated then.


Sending you love, light and positive vibes,

Cassie K.

"Always remember to LIVE life to the fullest, to LAUGH at everything and to LOVE unconditionally."

53 views4 comments

Recent Posts

See All


Mar 17

Acknowledging responsibility can be challenging for many individuals. After reflecting on this, I've come to realize the importance of saying "no" more frequently. A recent incident highlighted this for me when a friend asked to extend her visit. Although I struggled to decline, accommodating her disrupted my weekend plans, leaving me feeling less productive than intended.

Mar 18
Replying to

Thank you for sharing!


Ryk Goodwin
Ryk Goodwin
Mar 17

Accountability is huge. Thank you for this!

bottom of page